وبلاگ آقا ابطحی دوباره کله پا شده و آقا ابطحی ام دوام نياورده و جواب داور رو تو وبلاگ نيک آهنگ چاپ کرده. البته درسته که آقا ابطحی نابود شدن وب سايتشون را گردن قسمت و ایادی غيب مياندازند، ولی من معتقدم که این مسأله يک جوری ربطی به وبلاگ نويسان پشيمان و غير پشيمان داره که البته سوالی که پيش ميايد اینست که آيا انسان اصولاً بايد ابراز پشيمانی بکند يا که نکند

فريد سی بی سی هم اومد. این آقا تنها پارتی ما در سی بی سی که همون صدا و سيمای جمهوری کانادا است ميباشد. خيلی هم آدم نازنينيست، کلی هم حرف برای گفتن دارد. خلاصه اگر این فريد نبود شايد من هرگز اتاقک کار خوشتيپ ترين مرد صدا و سيمای، کانادا را که همان اوين سولمان باشد را نميديدم

My friend Behrang, whom I sincerely love, has a female little black fish inside him. No wonder he is so distinguished. Being the true intellectual that he is, he wants to research our blogging experiences. Go ahead and answer his questions, he is going to put this into good use.

من داشتم برای پروژه حوزويم در اینترنت چرخ ميزدم. در بعضی از این سايتهای شخصی حوزوی ایرادهای جالبی به این ابولبلاگ حسين درخشان ميگرفتند. جميع طلاب-البته- فقط با شرابخواری حسين (به او يدالّله نيز گويند) مشکل داشتند. برای من خيلی جالب بود که آقايان با افاضات حسين در مورد سياست و رهبری و .....مشکلی ندارند و فقط ميگويند کاشکی نمينوشيد. خدا عاقبت همه را بخير کناد

این حافظ من را گرفته....من وقتی حوصله ندارم ، کاری با کار این قافله ندارم، ميرم سراغ حافظ. حالا که گلاب بروتون بيمارم ، تب دارم ميگه

خوش آمد گل وز آن خوشتر نباشد

که در دستت بجز ساغرنباشد

غنيمت دان و می خور در گلستان

که گل تا هفته ديگر نباشد

بيا ای شيخ از خمخانه ما

شرابی خور که در کوثر نباشد

جالب اینکه من ديروز سرفراز از يک آزمون الکلهوليکی، الکلی بيرون آمدم. البته بنظرم کمی سؤالات بيربط بودند. به عنوان مثال اگر کسی الکل ميخورد که راحت تر خوش گذرانی کند و خودش نباشد (يا که باشد) الکليست

به هرحال جناب حافظ، با این وعضيت خراب، بنده نميتوانم شراب خواری کنم. مرحمت شما زياد

تو بالکن، بقل من نشسته بود. يه جايی نشسته بوديم که بادی ها رو خوب ببينيم. من ولی تو کار خورشيدفر بودم. به نظرم خيلی از سازش کوتاهتر بود. بيليط گيرمون نيومده بود، سينا خواب مونده بود و دير رسيده بود . از بالکن بدم ميومد. نصف نوازنده ها رو فقط کله هاشون رو ميديدم. حوصله ام سر رفته بود. از موسيقی قرن بيستم خوشم نمياد. از پيشم بلند شد. دستم يخ زد.نخواستم بلندشم. پاهاش به پام ماليد. نفسم در نمی آمد. تو بالکن ربرويی ديدمش، اونجا که نميشه با ديها رو ديد! پيش صبا بود، ديگه فرقی نميکرد

Not being able to fit is not an urge, it is a burden. One might bring value in every single circle one exists. One might respect and stay within every single moral boundary forced upon one. One might lead a much normalized life, a successful one by every standard. However, one might still not fit, not connect, not exist.
I am not able to fit, my dear Mr. Namazi, not because I want to reject the existing boundaries. I am living within these boundaries, I am dreaming beyond them. I live my unrealistic, unattainable world in my dreams that is my escape from your logical world.

Morality, society, and culture create boundaries that one ought to live within. When you do not fit within those boundaries, you just don’t fit. In fact I have not been fitting for a long time. I don’t even fit in my clothing anymore……
My new-year resolution: join the damn nobody likes me club.

دوستی اصلاح طلب ميگفت که به محسن رضائی رأی ميدهد چون معتقد است که بی عرضگی معين و نوکر صفتی ولايتی و لاريجانی را ندارد. می گفت يا کرّوبی يا رضائی، اینها آنقدر پاچه پاره اند که حتی در مقابل خود رهبری نيز مياستند. با وجود اینکه دکتر معين نامزد محبوب من است، داشتم فکر ميکردم که او نيز آخر سر کاری را از پيش نخواهد برد. تمام مشکلات و معضلاتی که خاتمی با آنها روبرو بود برای معين دو برابر خواهد شد. معين مشروعيت روحانی بودن ندارد و کلی هم مظلوميت دارد. داشتم فکر ميکردم که شايد بهتر باشد که ما معيارهای انتخاب خود را بر مبنای پاچه پارگی بگذاريم، چرا که از مظلوميت خيری نرسيد

من اگر جای گوگوش بودم پدر این گويا رو در مياوردم با این نظرخواهی مسخره شان. اولاً که گوگوش هنرمند مردمی هست و هيچوقت ادعا سياسی بودن نداشته. دومّا چه دليلی دارد که سايت گويا وسط تمامی رهبران و فعالّان سياسی ناگهان نام گوگوش را پديدار کند؟ حالا درست است که خودشان گفته اند که زياد قضيه جدّی نيست، ولی تنها قسمتی که خودشان جدّی نگرفته اند قرار دادن گوگوش در این همه پرسی است.
آيا هدف گويا به تمسخر گرفتن سياستمداران از طريق مقايسه آنها با هنرمندان است؟
من جداً معتقدم که ما دچار نوعی ضديت هنری هستيم . در خلوتمان، در محافل مان، و در منازلمان از هنر این هنرمندان لذت ميبريم و در جای خود آنها را سبک ميدانيم و مسخره ميکنيم. حالا من پاچه خواری گوگوش را نه به این لحاظ ميکنم که مصطفی او را دوست ميدارد. بلکه شخصيت تاريخی گوگوش بسيار حائز اهميت است. بسياری از دوستان در دوران محبوبيت خاتمی این دو را باهم مقايسه کردند. در همین حال بسیاری از تاريخ نگاران معاصر که به مسأله سنت و مدرنيسم در موسيقی ایران پرداخته اند دچار فراموشکاری فرهنگی- تاريخی اند که ميتوان ريشه های آن را در همين ضديت با هنر پاپ/سبک يافت. به عنوان مثال دوست عزيزم مجيد مير منتهايی در کتاب خود "سنت و مدرنيسم در موسيقی ایران " نامی از گوگوش و موسيقی او نمياورد. باتوجه به اینکه مجيد تحقيقات خود را در ایران کرده و کتاب نيز چاپ ایران است این مسأله کاملاً قابل درک است. ولی کنون که گوگوش مقيم کاناداست يکی تاريخ نگار برجسته بايد که او را مصاحبه کناد قبل از فراموشی فرهنگی- تاريخی

Rosewater to your face I have a very bad runny stomach, as a result I might not be able to go to the ski trip my partner’s been planning for the past month. All our friends are going and he is very upset that I cannot be there with him.

نيک آهنگ کوثر، زمينشناس مقيم کانادا

تغيير شغل اجباری
تحليلی بر زلزله اخير را با لهجه شيرازی در بی بی سی گوش کنيد

همانطوری که قبلاً عرض شد من وقتی عصبانی و ناراحت ميشم نقاشی ميکشم...این کارم هم ناشی از عصبانيت رفراندومی و خاله زنکيهای مربوطه است. با احترامات فائقه از همه دستندرکارن تقاضا دارم که مرا دوباره به حالت جنون دراورند تا من بتوانم این اثر هنری خود را به پايان رسانم

این رفيق لر من ديشب به من ابراز عشق کرده، و امروز اومده خونمون و این شکلات دراز رو برای من هديه آورده (خواهش ميکنم اندازه شکلات را با هويج کوچک مقايسه فرماييد.) آخر شما جای من بوديد چی فکر ميکرديد

من امشب ظرف نشستم،خدا خودش کمک کنه

این آقا ما که نصفش اصفهانی و نصفه ديگرش محلّاتی، به نظافت خيلی اهميت ميده...اوايل که می آمد خونه من همه جا رو هی تمييز ميکرد و بروش نمياورد. يک روز بهم گفت من به نظافت خيلی اهميت ميدم، ولی من به روی خودم نياوردم و به زندگی شلم شومبای خودم ادامه دادم. از قضا روزی در حال مطالعه بی بی سی فارسی خبری توجه مرا جلب کرد: درگيری در محلّات، 12 نفر کشته. وقتی به گزارش صوتی از خود محلّات گوش دادم فهميدم در محله ای شخصی افغانی نظافت را رعايت نميکرده و همين باعث درگيری و مرگ 12 نفر از اهالی شد.از آن روز بود که من نيمه محلّاتی آقامون را شديداً جدّی ميگيرم

It’s Boxing Day, 5:00 o’clock in the morning I wake up with hangover headache. As my computer turns on I am thinking maybe something good happened in the world, and then I remember my grandfather who said “no news is good news.” There has been a massive earthquake somewhere in Kerman, my whole body is radiating heat. I call Mambo, she tells me that all are relatives in Kerman are O.k. and that Bam was the center. Its 10:00 o’clock in the morning I already have 1000 flyers with the donation numbers of Mercy Corps and the Red Cross on them. All my neighbors are coming to help. Amirhossien is sick, he has fever. He is standing in the cold with all of us handing out flyers. We are all devastated…….
It’s Boxing Day; it’s 5:00 o’clock in the afternoon. I did not check my news in the morning, I was too sacred. I just checked BBC. There has been another massive earthquake. When does it all end? Please donate to the Canadian Red Cross or Mercy Corps.

Jesus’ Sexuality!

Jesus comes to this world as the son of god. Mary is a virgin and thus had never had sex before having the baby. As the story goes Jesus himself never had sex, he only had one temptation and no one knows what exactly happened. It has been suggested that he was gay.
Jesus sexuality is for biblical historians to research, and they have done so. My point is that the guy is so asexual that you can only love him as your best friend, brother, or maybe the son of god. His baby face (as often depicted), his long brown hair, his innocent eyes…. who can dare and have a sexual thought on Jesus?
I am thinking maybe we Muslims made the horrible mistake of surfacing prophet’s and Imam’s sexualities. I guess people tend to associate sexuality with unholiness. This; however, is like the chicken and the egg story. Is sex unholy? Is religious morality responsible for making sex sinful?
The perception of Prophets in modern life is very similar to that of Hollywood celebrities. Those who sleep around, those who are against war, those who are pro-war, those who are spiritual, those who are having affairs, and those who do charitable work….they all have their own fans.

جيزز جون تولدت مبارک. ببخشيد ديشب کليسا نتونستم بيام تولدتون رو حضوری تبريک بگم....این مسلمون ها نگذاشتن.خيلی بخيلاً جداً! امروز حتماً خدمت ميرسم

For Christmas,
I got a broom in the ass….I am supposed to get all my other gifts after the Boxing Day. My new-year resolution is to join the nobody likes me club!

به خدا این دوستان واقعاً شرمنده کردن به من لينک دادن...مثلاً این ایمان که يک انسان واقعی هست. جالب این هست که يک بابا بی نام و نشانی هم در قسمت نظرات ایمان به من (يا ما) گفته: "حزب الّلهی های حرامزده" . من در این ارتباط بايد بگويم که: حزب فقط و فقط حزب الّله

من بعضی اوقات خودم هم تعجب ميکنم که چی از دهنم در مياد...
من راستش آدمه خيلی چپی هستم ولی الان يک سه ماهی هست که دارم رو يک پروژه در ارتباط با حوزه علميه قم کار ميکنم. فکر کنم اینقدر این نشرييات حوزوی را خواندام که يک مقداری دست راستی شدم. حکايت حکايت این سوسکای آپارتمانم هست که دلم نمییاد از بینشون ببرم

ابطحی مثل اینکه وبلاگش کله پا شده! کسی ميدونه چرا؟
من این ابطحی و داداش انتشاراتی شو خيلی دوست دارم، واقعاً اینها فکر کنم که تو رودربياستی پدر بزرگوارشون حوزه رفتن. والله اینها واقعاً به درد يک رشته ادبی هنری تو دانشگاه آزاد ميخوردند. شما خودتون این برادران رو با شلوار جين و موی بلند تصور کنيد، کدوم بيشتر بهشون مياد اباء و عمامه؟

در ضمن اگه خدای نکرده این آقا ابطحی از کار بيکار شده يک وقتی ناکار شد ميتونه بره دسک ادب و هنر این راديو فردا که اینقدر آهنگ های مبتذل پخش نکنن

Nationalist Art

Since there is not much going on in the world aside from Tony’s little secret game, I am going to stick to art criticism…
Over a month ago Arta Gallery here in Toronto was hosting Nasser Ovassi’s painting. In the gallery I met my dear friend professor Hamid, and we decided to write a little critique of the art work. We were both amazed by the nativvist nationalist content of the art. I remember that in one of my classes I had argued against labeling any form of art Orientalist. My main argument was that no artist will deliberately serve the means of Orientalism as defined by Edward Said, as art should be looked upon apolitically even if political.
Ovassi’s art however, talk about self-orientalized art. What you could find in every single painting was women, pomegranates, and horses or any combination of the three. The women had round faces, rosy checks, big eyes, thick eyelashes, gold jewelry, and submissive characters. The pomegranates looked pretty much like any pomegranate found in any supermarket. The horses were feminized and had rosy checks, big eyes, thick eyelashes, gold jewelry, and rebellious characters. Written on some of the painting were nationalistic poetries from Ferdowsi and other poets. The ancient Iranian symbols of Achaemenid times were often combined in some forms with the other symbols. Tombs of Cyrus the great, Mithra’s figure, Achaemenid soliders were all present in the paintings. The flashy use of the gold color was a prominent feature of all the painting.
When you are dealing with symbolic art you often wonder what the symbols mean. So I asked Ovassi why he has focused on such symbols. He told me because they are all Iranian. “Horses are native to Iran; even the famous Arabian horse was originally from Iran. The pomegranate everyone knows that it is an Iranian passion fruit. No one else had it in the world and they took pomegranate seeds from Iran. These women are the women of Iran, the most beautiful in the world. We are known for our women around the world. I am trying to show what authentic Iranianess mean. We have great history, a glorious past, we were the greatest empire, and we were the creators of justice. I want to show that in my art.”
It was then that it hit me. This art is the lowest of the low. Why would anyone want to purchase a piece of artwork that reminds them of their glorious past, their nationalist feelings, their nativists sentiments, and their false sense of identity. Are we deceiving ourselves into believing that we as Iranians were so great before Islam that we had horses, beautiful submissive women, and pomegranates we exported to the world? Give me a break….buy your very sweet Spanish pomegranate from the market, look at achievements of women around the world, and if you are lucky ride and Arabian horse, cause they are the best in the world.

بابا این اینانا شرمنده کرده به من لينک داده، و کلّی رونق بازار رو برده بالا....من خر رو بگو که يک سه روزيه دارم پاچه خواری این دوستم و اون دوستم رو ميکن که به ما يک لينکی بدن...حالا اون دوستم ،ابولبلاگه و در حال تبليغ مذهب بلاگيسم در مهد کفره و سرش شلوغه! مريم گل ماه درخت خيلی لطف کردی

Islam, Women, and Canada

I guess I over wrote and forgot my main point. There is a possibility of women abuse in the new Islamic court system and I am not saying that it will not happen. However, recognizing that Islam as a whole is against women and their rights is a dangerous argument and I appreciate Boyd’s decision for that. Maybe, Inshallah within the construct of the Canadian law we will be able to create an authentic Islamic legislation very different from that of the authoritarian Islamic states we all ran away from. This is coming from an atheist so please appreciate it.
The problem with some of these humane rights activists exiled from Islamic states is that, they want to eliminate Islam from the face of the earth. Guess what…that is not going to happen.

Way to Go Boyd!!

من حرف حساب به فارسی نميتونم بزنم، ولی ميخواهم تلاش خودم رو بکنم. الان يک ساله که تو این استان اونتريو مساله دادگاهای شريعه است . خلاصه بگم که قانون اونتريو به دو نفر این حق رو ميده که اختلافتشون با کمک يک داور يا حکميت که خودشون خيلی دوستش دارن حل کن. این قانون وقت در مورده اختلافات مدنی هستش و کسی نميتونه اون رو در مورده مسائل جنائی و غيره استفاده کنه. يعنی اگه کسی مشکل ارث،پول،قرض، ملک مستأجر،ملک مالک و غيره داشت اگه دل خودش خواست و دل طرف مقابلم خواست ميتونه بره پيش ننه اش، يا آخوند، يا موبد، يا کشيش، و يا..... این بيشتر بدرد آدمهای ميخوره که آنيکی قانون بدردشون نميخوره. يعنی به دلايل مذهبی و فرهنگی قانون اونتاريو نميتونه به نيازشون پاسخ بده. مسيحيها و يهوديها يک عمره دارن از این قانون بهره ميبرن، حالا که نوبت مسلمان ها شده چندين گروه شاکی شدن: محافظه کارها ای غربی، چپی های غربی و شرقی، مسلمان های چپی و زنها. جالب این هست که اینها همگی جميعاً نگران حال زنها هستند و ميگن چون قوانين اسلامی در اقصی نقاط دنيا به زنها گند زدن این قانون رو کلّن بر دراريد که نه مسلمان ها بتونن سؤ استفاده کنن نه بقيه بتونن استفاده کنن. ولی همين ديروز دولت ليبرال اونتريو به همه اینها گفت زکی! به عبا رت ديگه دولت اونتريو قبول نکرد که ضد اسلام باشه. و چون من الان دارم جون ميکنم با این فارسی تايپ کردنم ، باقی رو به اینگيليسی بخوانيد

So what happened was that the government of Ontario appointed Marion Boyd to go and double check everything and find out whether the Sharia law within the construct of Arbitration Act is capable of screwing women, like its been done so in many Islamic governments. Well, who could have done this better than former Attorney-general Marion Boyd, the women is like the Mohammad-i Amin. What she’s found out was that, there are some slight problems within the Arbitration Act; however, using Muslim religious principles within Canadian court system is defiantly possible. She also asked everyone to stop calling it Sharia court, because these courts are only for civil disputes.

People who have been active against the Sharia courts have been motivated to do so differently, and have often been very biased.
The right winged conservatives are against it because they are generally against the presence of the other, the immigrant, the Muslim immigrant, the Muslim. Lets call this group Orientalists (yeah I am labeling…so what!). The good old argument of after September 11th things are balah balah blah is also valid here.
The left winged politicians are taking the side of those who vote for them: the immigrants from Muslim countries that have been often badly screwed by their former governments. Because of their bad experiences this self-oreintalizing group are saying that Islamic law has ruined the lives of many around the world, why are we to commit this suicide here in Canada.
The advocates were basically saying, I am a Muslim I would like to use my Sharia to resolve my civil disputes, Christians are doing it, Jews are doing it, why shouldn’t I?

What Marion Boyd said was that, the Islamic law within of Ontario’s very democratic court system is unlikely to screw anyone since it only includes civil matters and not criminal ones. “Muslim principles should be considered an acceptable method of religious arbitration as long as they do not violate Canadian law.” You can read what Boyd said in the media, and I am very proud of her because she did write a very fair report in the midst of the struggle between all these forces.

Bruce/Pishi
My Friend Bahman, has recently adopted a kitten. The previous owners had named the Kitten Bruce, and asked Bahman to keep the name. Bahman; however, calls him Pishi. So the kitten similar to many Iranian children with parents who do not get along has two names: Bruce, and Pishi. Whatever, you wish to call him, he is the cutest thing. Above is a picture of him two month ago when he was very little.

عمه پوران

شب يلدا هميشه خونه عمه بوديم. آشپزی عمه ام خيلی بد بود. شوهرش دکتر بود و عمه ام هيچی روغن به غذا نميزد. ميخواست همه چی سالم باشه. قبل از اینکه بريم خونه عمه، من هميشه غذایم رو ميخوردم. عمم سرطان داره. باهاش حرف زدم امروز، کلّی گريه کردم

Tradition, Tradition, Tradition!

Between burning the Israeli Flag, the down with Isreal slogans, and Jews are all Zionists propaganda in Iran I owned a Betamax video tape of the musical Fiddler on the Roof. A Gift from my English teacher Mr. Dehbod, it was my only emotional bridge to the world of the Jewish people. The characters were the only Jews I’d ever known; and the folk tales were very similar to that of mine. My dilemma was the fact that I loved all these Jews, their tradition, their music, and their dance. Their struggle was like that of a fiddler on a pointy roof: careful not to fall he balanced while playing his tunes. One side of the pointy roof he played his traditions, the other side reforms.
Over the years I have let go of most of my culture’s suppressing traditions, I have been playing on the reform side for a while now. Except that I am still obsessed with my ceremonial rituals, my folk culture, my music, my art, my religious stories, and my myths. I think I might have learned this important from my Jewish friends in the Fiddler on the Roof.
Last night I got very depressed when Mostafa told me no Yalda celebration, he was watching basketball. I had already bought six pomegranates and a watermelon. I went to my room, closed the door, turned on BBC radio2, and waited for someone’s call, anyone’s call. It had to be Behrang of course. It was his birthday, what a night to be born at!
Farnoush lit the candles, seeded out the pomegranates, prepared the watermelon, and we read Hafiz. Just like the olden days at my Aunt's place.

Bring It On!

This new public sphere that exists on the www, begs for analysis. In the past few weeks the Iranian community in the Diaspora has been very polarized and divided on the issue of “the referendum in Iran.” The advocates of this referendum are not welcoming much criticism. The fight between the two groups has been taken to the www public space particularly the weblogs. However, in this faceless private public people are capable of expressing their opinions anyway they want to. In the comments’ section of a prominent Iranian journalist/cartoonist/blogger you can find very interesting faceless comments. Some people choose to write on the issue anonymously, others adopt fake names, and some adopt fake identities. The purpose is to mock one another in issues related to referendum and beyond. This faceless mimicry and the mockery is only possible in this faceless private public space. As a person who has been participating as an anonymous faceless commenter I have to say: “I am lovin’ it babe!”

Don’t Talk About Sex

The sex talk was very frustrating. During the discussion period, the audience talked about everything but women’s sexuality. They analyzed and discussed the relationship between women’s sexuality and imperialism, colonialism, post-colonial theory, modernism, post-modernism, power, economy, politics, religion, moral values, and freedom. Except that people started an argument saying that “women’s sexuality is very complicated for example yadah yadah yadah…imperialism.”
Everyone was talking about every single “ism” they knew of to avoid speaking of the vagina, virginity, sex, sexual positions, oral sex, anal sex, pleasure, and having a good time in general.
Iranian women’s sexuality is certainly a taboo, one cannot talk about it.

George Michael

If you are a fan of George Michael listen to his performance at the BBC radio 2. I have always loved George Michael ever since I got my first album when I was eleven. As an eleven year old kid I could totally understand that he loved men.

خیکی بی خاصییت

وای من تازه فهميدم که چقدر خيکيم! بوق آتيش ساختمونمون به صدا در اومد و من برای نجات جون آروين مجبور شدم 8 طبقه برم بالا و آروين رو که هز خواب خوش بر روی تخت آبييش پريده بود رو آرمش بدم. وای که من چقدر نفس نفس زدم برا همين 8 طبقه. من ديگه واقعاً رژيم ميگيرم و ورزش ميکنم چونکه فکر کنم به زودی بميرم با اين وضع.

اینم آروین

من بچه ندارم ولی اصلاً بدم نمياد بچه مردم رو قرض بگيرم. آروين بچه دوستم بزنم به تخته خيلی با هوشه و من واقعاً عاشقشم. خلا صه اگه شما هم مثل من عقده بچه دارين ميتونيد بيايين خونه من و از وجود آروين لذت ببرين. آروين دو روز قراره پسر من باشه چون مامان باباش دارن ميرن خارج واسه کاری

Let’s talk about sex babe!

We are going to debate our heads off on “Pleasure and Danger: Women's Sexuality and Patriarchal Order.” Every Saturday we go to this debate clubish place called “Agora”, seemingly founded by Ramin Jahanbegloo. The real founders where in fact a bunch of unknown students who cared. During Ramin’s time this debate club was reduced to a dating club with the greatest number of attendance.
Today should be interesting cause we will be talking about Iranian women's sexuality, this is such a huge taboo.

Time: Saturday Dec 18th 2004, 16:30 PM.Location: Room B024, Bahen Centre for Information Technology (BA),40 St George Street, M5S 2E4.

سیبیل طلا

ارث من از پدرم سیبیلی نسبتآ کلفت بود که بسیار مایه دردسر بودی! در عنفوان نوجوانی که همه دختران را عشقی بودی سر من بی کلاه بودی. آنگاه دوستی مرا بگفتی که تو سیبیل خود بزنا اوخود به سراغ تو آمدندی. من نیز سیبیل خود را کنداندیدم و ابروان خود را برداشتیدم و آنگاه بود که خوشبختیدم.
اما دیری نپایید که مرا از مدرسه بجرم بی سیبیلی اخراج کرده و گفتند که هرگاه سیبیلت دوباره رویید بازگرد.
لاجرم من سیبیل خود را رویاندم. ولی چون مخفی کردن سیبیلی یه آن کلفتی ازمعشوق دشوار بودی راه چاره میبایستی.
مادرم هر بار که مرا وعده معشوق بودی سیبیلم را با مواد شیمییائی طلائی نمودی و صبح بعدی دوباره رنگ سیاه نمودی. آنگاه بودی که مرا سیبیل طلا نامیدند.

Golden Mustache

Sibiltala means golden mustache literary. From my Iranian parents, I inherited facial hair, a unibrow, the obesity gene, and very large bones. In my teenage years boys disfavored me (they still do), and I was advised by a peer that this is due to my mustache. So, one day I waxed my mustache off, plucked my unibrow, and I was not fat yet. So, it happened, a boy fell for me. The only problem was I was expelled from school for removing my facial hair. I was told to come back to school whenever my mustache is grown back
In the olden days in Iran, girls were not supposed to remove their facial hair before getting married. I thought to myself, no one is going to marry me with this tick mustache, I needed a solution
However, my first love had already shown interest and I knew it had something to do with me not having a mustache anymore. So I waited for the hairs to grow back and went back to school. From that day on, I bleached my facial hair every time I had to see my boyfriend and dyed it black every morning before going to school. The bleached mustache of mine had a golden blond color, hence the name: Sibiltala.

Lovy Dovy!!!!!

I just realized that I had a very sentimental start. I am in love with cockroachesand and walls, what is happening to me. Let me just tell you that this is not me, for some wired reason I happen to be idealizing emotions. I’ll be myself soon. Or maybe I do suffer from excessive sensibility, I just had to write it out, I guess.

I last fell in love on this street
I am a very aggressive female when it comes to dating. If I like someone, I’ll let them know. This is where I first met my partner Mosi.

I fist fell in love in front of this wall
This photo is taken By Jahanshah Javid. I cannot tell you how happy I was to have found it. This is one of the walls of “Cinema Tras-i Chaplin” in “Bahman Cultural Center” south of Tehran. It is where I gave my first performance for the first time at a ticketed venue. I also fell in love that night right in front of this wall.
Teenage love is like a drug, it has the effect of sniffing coke. It released endorphins to the pleasure centers in your brain. Never again in your life you will experience this heightened state being.

Goli and babak

Golnoush and Babak are leaving our town. Golnoush is my high school friend whom I imported to Canada when I moved here (or rather she imported me.) I am going to miss them dearly.

sleep-dancing

This Farid CBC, is quite a character. Thanks to him I enjoyed a drunken night at the CBC. When I came back home, Mosi had already thrown a party for himself. Aida and Arash were our over night guests due to some construction work in their apartment. Aida slept with me on the bed; she was too scared of our cockroaches. It was then that the bisexual me could not sleep the rest of the night and ended up observing Aida
Aida is so tiny that I felt like a Gorilla. She was so peaceful and she had all these choreographed stretch movements she did while she was sleeping. She would slowly stretch her arms towards the ceiling while moving her face away from her arms. She’d then smile and slowly frown and bring her hands down. It was as if she was sleep-dancing. I really sympathize with men who like beautiful women, I do too.

cockroaches in my apartment

The cockroaches in my apartments are from the German breed. They are extremely smart and I have been doing some research on them. The interesting thing is that the more you read about a species the more you tend to like it. So with more research I became increasingly attached to my cockroaches and I could not kill them anymore. It was then that Mosi called the management of the building. They have exterminated most of my cockroaches; however, every once in a while I see one. I cannot admit this, but I get happy when I see the last survivors.

This weblog thing is quite an amazing phenomenon. It is a private public space. It is private enough that I can write anything, and public enough to possibly have it heard. So since this is as private as my shower here it goes. This jackass person is being a pain in the ass. My whole day has been wasted thinking and talking about this. However, good things do come out of anger and stress. I took two old canvases and stuck them together. Painted over my old painting and started a new one. It’s been going geat so far. If I finish it today, I’ll post it up.
The old painting on the canvases was a failed project. I tend to associate physical entities with love and emotion. These are often things that I associate with my nostalgic memories of love. They include places, instruments, trees, certain perfumes, cowboy boats, glasses, etc. Now imagine an artwork that was an abstraction of a trumpet, a sad women(me), deep woods, Fahrenheit brand cologne, the face of Charlie Chaplin, etc….the art work was a disaster so were my past love life

Monogamy

I saw Kinsey last night with my partner. Great movie! It got me thinking about monogamous relationships. Why is morality so keen on monogamy? What is the definition of a monogamous relationship? Is it simply defined by the boundaries of sexual intercourse?
I think one person cannot possibly satisfy all the needs of another person. I wake up everyday, have breakfast with my partner, leave home for my social engagements, come back home in the evening, have dinner with my partner, and if I am lucky we make love. During the time I am away from my partner I engage in these relationships with men and women of my society in which they all satisfy one or more of my needs. The need for love is one of them.
There is no mention of love in Kinsey’s research. He avoided love, because he was unable to measures it. However, most of the advocates of monogamy, define their moral boundaries based on love. You do not fuck your very charming co-worker because you do not want to hurt your lover. How about what goes on in the minds of people? How bout all those sexual fantasies we have of the long legged female prostitute in red. Or the beautiful kissing fantasy of the two men in your life you love the most. Or the heavy seducing flirtatious look upon your gay friend’s face that will never lead to sex.
I really think that this monogamous business is a load of crap. It is a social construct so that we can all be categorized into nuclear families that pass on their moralities to their children. Our eyes, our ears, our voice, our minds, and our bodies cheat on our monogamous partners everyday and we let it happen.

Sibil!!!

What was I thinking!!!!I’ll get into trouble for the name